My 8 yo has severe escalating anxiety about school (no bullying or other issues). She is at the point she is absolutely refusing to go to school; she will run out of the house in the mornings to avoid me (we live on acreage so no safety issue there), I will end up having to chase her down and physically carry her to the car, she completely hysterical on the drive, as well as crying and saying she wishes she was not alive. She is always fine at the end of the day but today I could not handle it and told her we were done with school before turning the car around and taking her home. She only has 5 days left, and we are having to switch schools next year anyway. Do I force school for these next 5 days, with how severe this is, or should I let go of this school year and focus on reducing accommodations and encouraging her over the Summer? I am buying the book but just heard about it today after seeing a webinar that included Dr. Eli Lebowitz. Please help me... I was sobbing myself as I watched this webinar; I've completely reached my tipping point here.
top of page
bottom of page
Hi Jennifer, I'm sorry to hear this struggle. There is not a great answer here as you really don't want to teach we will avoid school when anxious and also you will benefit from having more skills in place and a plan in place before approaching this. Thus, I think it would be ok to say something along the lines of "I can see your anxiety is a really big problem right now making it hard to go to school. It is my job to help you in this fight against anxiety so I am going to get the help we need to do that to before we start school in the Fall." This way you would be communicating a plan to take parental action, make it clear this is not going to be a forever solution and not escalating the situation in the moment without a plan in place. I would definitely recommend you work with a provider or go through a SPACE group to learn and build a plan for what could be burgeoning school refusal. If possible, it's also important to try and learn what is driving the fear of school as they will also be important. I provide SPACE to residents of all PSYPACT states in group and individual formats. Our next group starts July 12th! Feel free to reach out to info@tapclinicnc.com to learn more or visit: https://www.tapclinicnc.com/space
I am not a clinician; I look forward to reading responses. My 8 year old‘s end of 5th grade was horrible because we did not have her OCD care established. I wish I would have given her (and me) a pass.